From Psalm 27
The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear...One thing I have desired of the LORD, That will I seek; That I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the LORD...I would have lost heart, unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living. Wait on the LORD; Be of good courage, and he shall strengthen your heart; wait , I say, on the LORD!
Thursday, April 9, 2009
One Year
Monday, April 6, 2009
Resting
Resting is something that is hard for me to do. My life is busy and full and there is always so much to do. I fill every second and work off of lists. This weekend was full with family here from out of town and many things planned. One evening, I found myself waiting for people to arrive for dinner with the timing a bit uncertain. I had done everything I could to prepare to start dinner, but had some extra time. I was thinking through my options of things I could do for the next few minutes while I waited to hear people were on their way, but I was feeling a bit under the weather and decided maybe it would be alright to sit down and put my feet up for a minute. It was a bit hard for me to do and didn’t feel very productive, but I realized I had done everything I needed to do and it was alright to rest. As I sat down in the cushy chair and closed my eyes for a rare bit of relaxation, the thought occurred to me that I have done everything I can to move our adoption paperwork. There is nothing else I can do. I’ve done all of the preparing I can do for the next step. It is alright to rest. Somehow, I felt that if I stopped and just rested, rather than trying to make someone move or do something else, I was giving up on the process. I realized that perhaps I just need to use this time to rest.
One of the events of the weekend was The Race for the Roses. My husband, sister, her husband, a couple friends and I were signed up for this event. We had worked hard over the past several months to prepare. I had worked my way up to a good pace. However, as race day approached, several things were working against me, including getting sick. On the morning of the race, rather than making a pace, my new goal became to finish the race without getting pneumonia. That meant I needed to make myself go at a slower pace where I could run without being winded. Much to my surprise, it ended up being a much more pleasant run than I have had in the past. When I wasn’t pushing myself for my fastest pace or trying to keep pace with someone else, I was actually able to enjoy the run. There were things to see along the way and I wasn’t in pain. I realized with this adoption, I have been striving and striving to keep up a good pace. Trying to meet artificial goals for when I think things should be done or trying to keep pace with other people has caused great frustration along the way when I should be enjoying the miracle that is unfolding along the way. During the race last weekend, I knew I had a sprint in me when I needed it. When I got caught in a pack of people or there were times when I felt it was time for a short sprint, I had it in me to sprint for a few minutes. When I have an opportunity to move paperwork along in this process, I’m prepared to sprint again. I also knew that I had done everything I needed to do to be able to finish my race. Even though I was running slowly, I knew I didn’t need to worry about finishing the race. I need to remember that with this adoption too. God has brought us this far and showed us what we need to do. I don’t need to worry about whether we will bring him home.
“Trust in the Lord, and do good; dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness. Delight yourself also in the LORD, and He shall give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD, Trust also in Him and He shall bring it to pass. (Psalm 37)
Monday, March 30, 2009
Prepare
Throughout this process, even before we found him on an agency listing, I felt like God had spoken to my heart about being prepared. Last week, a friend told me that when she prays for us, she thinks of the word "prepare." I've spent the past few days reflecting on preparation. It feels like we have done many things to be prepared. However, that doesn't mean God is finished preparing us or Joshua. A couple of days ago, I went to the gym intent on running 10 miles at a good pace. I thought I was prepared, but a couple of miles on the treadmill revealed I wasn't as prepared as I thought. My new shoes were not working well, my energy was low and in the end, I realized I had started too late and didn't have enough time. I've been praying that God will show me the areas where I need to do more to prepare. Perhaps it has nothing to do with adoption paperwork or preparing my house. Although I have my next package ready to send to USCIS, a photo album ready to mail to Joshua and letter ready to send with the first care package...and I've organized some closets. Perhaps it has more to do with drawing nearer to the One who led us on this journey to begin with. I decided to do a scripture search on "prepare" to see what God has to say and found these treasures.
Psalm 23:5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.
Mark 1:3 Prepare the way of the Lord; make His paths straight.
John 14:2 I go to prepare a place for you.
1 Cor 2:9 Eye has not seen, nor ear heard, Nor have entered into the heart of man the things God has prepared for those who love him.
Eph 2:10 For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them.
Heb 11:16 But now they desire a better, that is, a heavenly country. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for He has prepared a city for them.
There is plenty there for meditation.
I also thought about inspiration from a movie that caused me to think about Joshua months before we knew whether we would find him for adoption. It is from the movie, Facing The Giants...
I know thy works: behold, I have set before thee an open door, and no man can shut it: for thou hast a little strength, and hast kept my word, and hast not denied my name." Revelation 3:8
There were two men with fields that needed rain. They both prayed for rain, but only one went out and prepared his fields for it.
Which one are you?
God will send the rain in His time, your job is to prepare your fields for it.
Finally, as I look at the list of scriptures above, I can't help but be drawn to the Hebrews verse. My children all know that Hebrews Chapter 11, "the hall of faith" is my favorite chapter in the Bible. It is followed by the verse that I would probably pick as a life verse (if I'd ever picked one...) It seems to be a verse that comes to my mind often. Hebrews 12:1 "Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us... (okay, have to do part of next verse - 'looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith...' rest of Chapter is really good too -- this is why I've never designated a "life verse." I'm not very good at picking favorites.)
Thank you friends for your prayers, support and encouragement! They mean so much to us.
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
20 Years!!

Today is our 20th Wedding Anniversary. We had thought maybe we would do something glamorous, romantic and exciting for our 20th Anniversary. We were thinking of somewhere warm and tropical. Instead, we are happily waiting for letter of acceptance from China. The traditional 20th wedding gift is China. We will gladly do without new dishes this year. We would love to hear from China instead! Here is are some then and now pictures...
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Love Heals Your Heart
One of the things I've been doing while waiting for Joshua to come home has been running. I run because I know that it is good for me and I think God is using it to teach me many things, not the least of which is endurance. There isn't much that I enjoy about the actual running part since it is usually painful and inconvenient. What I enjoy most is sharing it with my husband and sister and that I can listen to my ipod shuffle - a wonderful gift from my sister! The music I have loaded is very encouraging and inspirational. Some of the songs in particular will remind me to pray for Joshua. The song linked above is one of them - Love Heals Your Heart. We feel very called and confirmed that he belongs in our family. We hope that he will be happy and blessed to join our family. We know that even if he is happy and excited, he will still have hurts to heal in his heart. This song is an encouragement to me when I listen to it. It makes me think of times in my life that my heart was so broken, I didn't think it could be fixed again and thankful that even broken hearts can heal. It reminds me to pray for God to pour His grace on Joshua, to ask for Him to enable us to pour our love into him and for our love and God's love to heal his sweet, little heart. For those of you, who like me check email after others are sleeping and prefer to avoid audio - I'll paste in the lyrics below...
-----
Did you think you were immune to this
Did you think you could escape without infection
You do all you're able to resist
Just to avoid the danger of rejection
Memory warns you of the past
When it all went wrong
When you think your life is shattered
And there's no way to be fixed again
Love heals your heart
At a time you least expected
You're alive like you have never been
Love heals your heart
Everybody has a wall to climb
That was built to guard the pain that holds them captive
Every smile that they would hide behind
Will try to mask the hurt beneath the surface
Sometimes it's hard to understand
How we're trapped inside
When you think your life is shattered
And there's no way to be fixed again
Love heals your heart
At a time you least expected
You're alive like you have never been
Love heals your heart
---
Okay - while I'm at it - another favorite Ipod song - an older song, but a goodie..
by Avalon - Testify to Love - This one can put me in danger of inadvertently smacking another runner, falling off of a treadmill or at least embarassing myself...
Mmmmm - one more....since I probably won't be buying any CDs in the near future and I didn't get it for my birthday - I splurged on the 99cent download from itunes to get this song onto my ipod tonight...you may recognize it from a previous post... great song!
Other Happenings...
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
What's In A Name